Showing posts with label homosexuality. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homosexuality. Show all posts

Saturday, 7 January 2012

Date 19: Ami: My Lesbian 'One Night Stand'

 

Why the homosexual date?
This post deserves some extra introduction. Not everyone is bi-curious. Most heterosexuals, particularly men, have been baffled by my desire to try and date a woman. But according to an article I read a while back, an increasing number of heterosexual women are opting for Gay one night stands. I must admit that when in Brighton, I witnessed this trend in the cheesy nightclubs I used to visit. Personally, I am more of a dater than a one-night stander, and so I very much doubt that I'll ever be trawling Revenge or lesbian dating sites for some one-night homo fun. And yet I can't help but wonder, am I missing out on something here? Have you seen Peep Show, series 1, episode 4? Cos that's where I was when I chose to try out this date.
I'm still firmly convinced that I like men. But there is no harm in one date as an experiment, right?
Who set me up this time?
 I asked everyone if they knew a lesbian who might be up for the challenge. Unfortunately many of the best lesbians appear to be taken but after much searching I found my girl. It's a bit of a cheat because it ended up occurring through a friend of a friend. Anna introduced me to Louise who put me in touch with Ami. Still, nothing was conventional about this date and I was very excited about it.
What did I know about her?
She went to Brighton uni but now works in London for the NHS. She is described to me as a 'lipstick lesbian'. For those of you who don't know what that means, it is basically a "feminine" lesbian who is attracted to other "feminine" lesbians.
First impressions
Ami was the only person who I let read my blog before going on our date. This is just because I didn't want to misrepresent myself. She said that she thought it was really funny and that she would love to participate for the sake of 'research'. She also warned me that if she turns me and my life gets turned upside down then I mustn't say that she didn't warn me. Ami is not on Facebook but Louise managed to send me a photo of her. Wow! She is very attractive. Ami has big brown eyes, tanned skin, high prominent cheek bones and an uplifting smile. She is small framed and decently curvy. I didn't know whether to feel intimidated or glad.
What happened?
We met at The Strand. I recognised Ami from her photo straight away. Ami was wearing black knitted tights, black suede boots, a cream and grey patterned sleeveless dress, a black fitted coat with fur collar and a paisley green scarf. Unlike the photo that Louise had sent me, Ami's dark hair was strikingly streaked with gold and caramel highlights. Instantly I realised that one advantage of dating a lipstick lesbian is that you get to check out and fully admire their style. I rarely consciously note a man’s style other than a quick 'he looks good.' but with Ami I found myself admiring every detail.
Ami told me that she would like to take me for cocktails and cake or deli board if I didn't fancy something sweet.  I did fancy something sweet. So we had a delicious chocolate and raspberry cake. Ami opted for a dirty martini and I went for the festive special of vanilla, apple vodka and cranberry juice. Good times. Cocktails and cake make a great date especially when you're in the mood for sugar!
Because of Ami's job with the NHS I had expected her to have a degree in health, biology or social care. Actually it turned out that she had graduated 2010 and since then temped at the NHS. She also had a degree in Art and actually wished that she could be doing something more creative. I found it very easy to empathise with her on that point. Ami told me that she was of 'mixed heritage'. She was born in Japan to a British father and a half Japanese, half American mother. I would never have guessed until she said it but it does explain her olive skin, unusually shaped big eyes and distinctive cheek bone structure. We had quite a few things in common. We discussed my peep show dilemma and found out that we both have a passion for awkward comedies.
Mark
We had a couple more cocktails. Inevitably, conversation moved to my sexuality. Several Women are so individually styled, beautiful, strong charactered and glamorous that they are awfully fun to eye ball. I'm not going to lie. If you're an attractive woman, whatever size, shape or origin, if you've been in my eye shot for long then I've probably checked you out. But then as Ami pointed out, even homosexual men often like to check out a fit woman. Also I confessed that I has a gay dream probably about once every 1-2 months. Then again, recently I also had an inappropriate dream about some random guy in the office that she hardly speaks to and is not my type at all. I don't fancy him, so merely dreaming about something is really not conclusive.
woman sleeping dreaming of slim belly
Still, Ami said that she was getting gay vibes from me! She's not the first. I have had girls come on to me in the past I boasted. Do you think it is my Tom boy childhood and habits? I always hated dresses and pink. I chose mighty max over polly pocket, Boys McDonalds happy meal over girls and I was the Blue power ranger over pink! But does any of this make me gay? Haha no! Women may be beautiful and lipstick lesbians may be intriguing, I'm still pretty certain i prefer men. Ami laughed at me and said that her gay-dar sucks anyway. Maybe the gay vibes that I was giving off were a result of the fact that I’d agreed to go on a date with her in the first place and also that I just have pervy eyes.
Ami insisted on getting the bill which was unnecessary but generous and appreciated. We said goodbye with a hug and a little kiss. On the cheek. Sorry for my readers who fancied a more scandalous ending to this date!
The date was fun and different. For me, the most surprising thing about the date was how normal and comfortable it felt. I think there is something fun, novel and hot about flirting with a lesbian. Lots have people have asked me what I would have done if she had kissed me on the lips. It might have been good for a one-off. I'm still a gay virgin.

Ami said she had fun and looks forward to reading her blog post! Being the heartfelt lady that I am, I doubt I’ll ever have a proper one night stand. I guess that this is probably the closet to a gay one night stand that I will ever get. At least until I have my mid-life crisis.

What others have said?
You went out with a lesbian?! How did it go? How did it go? How did it go?
Would I see her again?
Potentially we could be good friends. But after our date it might be a bit random. She is interesting to talk to and I do love my strong, creative women!
Would I recommend her to a friend?
Yes if I thought that they would click.


Date Planning 7.5
Rapport 8

Friday, 2 December 2011

Date 17: Brendan - When A Man Out-Dresses You (and is gay)



 
Who set me up this time?
Amar
Amar is one of the funniest men I know. He has a dirty, camp sense of humour. He is shockingly blunt and knows his own mind very well! To be honest he is a stereotypical gay guy. Amar was very competitive when it came to choosing me a date. I was very eager to see who he came up with. However we have very different taste in men! I think Amar thinks that he knows better than I do when it comes to men.
What did I know about Brendan?
He went to a private school in Harrow. He has a degree in fashion from the University of Edinburgh and he works for a large designer label in ‘brand management’. He enjoys skiing in the Alps which is where Amar met him. According to Amar, Brendan is articulate, cultured and fun. He sounds smooth.
First Impressions
I was absolutely paranoid about what to wear on my fashion designer date! I like the clothes that I wear but I am not known for my style.  In the end I opted for a navy V neck dress from mango and camel shoes from moda in pelle. You can’t go wrong with something as simple and neat as that. Brendan turned up in powder blue trousers, brown shoes and a white slim fitting shirt. He had swept over Black hair and emerald eyes. He was a vision.
What Happened?
Brendan was taking me to see a street ballet performance at a community centre near Clapham. I had actually been to a street ballet show before so I vaguely knew what to expect. Still, I felt a lot of pressure on my date with Brendan. I guess I am more of a beer and comedy girl as Martin (date 10) so fortunately had guessed. On the other hand, I was really excited to do something a bit different to my norm.
The show was actually brilliant and I am so glad that Brendan took me. The scenery was stunning and the dancing impressive. 
Next we went to a bar. I don’t think that I felt very comfortable on this date. We had a good discussion about the show and a few other normal small talk topics of conversation. But for some reason I didn’t feel at ease. I felt self-conscious and as if our conversations were a bit awkward. This might have been my shyness coming out. Brendan is so handsome it’s intimidating. 
Also Brendan is fiercely ambitious and competitive. It was really interesting to listen about his career. He was discussing the major fashion weeks and how he gets to go to 3 of them a year but he doesn’t always get a good seat at the shows. Within the next 5 years he wants to be right up the front. He explained his methods for doing so were basically living and breathing fashion and networking as much as possible. I can imagine that Brendan is good at networking. He is a pretty impressive guy all round. As I am sure you can guess, Brendan name dropped a lot.
Dee Ocleppo Designer Tommy Hilfiger and Dee Ocleppo attend the Tommy Hilfiger Spring 2010 Men?s & Women?s Collection at Bryant Park on September 17, 2009 in New York City.

Fashion is an undoubtedly sexy subject and an important part of our culture but I don’t really know much about what goes on behind the scenes. If I were to sum up my time on our date it would simply be fascinating.  Overall, Brendan seemed like a nice guy. He is captivating. I was attracted to him physically. He was also very attentive. He tended to my every need at the Lebanese restaurant we were at. But I did not think our personalities clicked in the way that they should do if you want to go on a second date. If I am honest, Brendan came across as a bit of a social climber with a real hunger for power and success. This is great but I still think that I am suited to someone who is more chilled out. I am attracted to people who are intelligent and resourceful but also go about creating success in a more individualistic way – perhaps. Plus Brendan might judge me for my curry and bud lifestyle and my rain coat and earmuffs attire! TBF I guess I would be pretending if I said that I didn't care that much about fashion. 


Would I go out with him again?
I feel inclined to say yes because Brendan is interesting and a nice guy. On the grounds of us not having very much in common though, I think that it is more likely to be a no. 
What other people have said?
They don’t think we sound like a good match. Amar has called me an idiot and told me that I am just intimidated by Brendan. I obviously disagree. I can be shy but not so shy that I wouldn’t take the plunge if I thought someone was right for me!

UPDATE: My naughty friend Amar set me up with Brendan knowing that we were totally incompatible because Brendan is actually homosexual! Thanks Amar! He thought it would be funny. HAHA idiot. So this should really be called my date with a gay guy! If you want to read about the hetero man that Amar set me up with try date 20.
Would I recommend him to a friend?
Yes
Date planning 9
Rapport 6.5
Sweetness 6.5
This was date 17 in my dating marathon. Click the links below to read about my other dates.